The most memorable – and scary – wedding buffet I ever saw was in the film ‘Great Expectations’. Reason being it was the wedding breakfast of a woman who had been jilted at the altar – thirty years before! Not a crumb had been touched since – at least by human hand. The rats, mice and spiders had done their best, or worst, and the whole ensemble was festooned with cobwebs like rigging on a sailing ship. The stately galleon of a cake had long since lost its hull, the upper tiers crashing down like topmasts hurling down on deck in a force ten gale. The once glorious spread looked like Rome after the fall. Centuries after.
Worst of all was the lady herself. Miss Havisham. Scared me to death. She hadn’t changed her wedding dress, which was now more moth-eaten than the cake. As she was herself. Good job we didn’t have smellyvision.